So, I've been a customer of Commerce Bank forever. And lately little TDs have been popping up everywhere all over the bank until eventually the place was taken over by TD bank over the past few days and has taken on TD's policies. They lost me as a customer in uhm - three days?

New record, really.

I walk into the bank like I do every Friday to deposit my check. I scheduled a credit card payment from my account that day like I often do. I deposited my money and was informed that it was immediately available as it was a payroll check. Like always. This is nothing new. The credit card payment hits my account and is approved. I have a positive balance. Everything is good. I liked Commerce a lot. They didn't screw around. They did things like they wanted me to be there. They treated me like they understood I don't have a tremendous amount of cash and they took care of me. I found myself walking in and learning about policies that made my jaw drop every day. (My favourite was when I found out there were no overdraft fees on check card transactions - they were AMAZING.)

Today I scoot on over to the now somewhat prettier (and far more 'big bank' looking) website and check my balance. Huh. I've got like, no money. I go check my recent transactions and see something I have NEVER seen before with Commerce.

INSUFFICENT FUNDS charges. Like three of them. ALL of them during a time when my account had a positive balance and even after the last one, I still have a positive balance. Obviously, I'm baffled. I call them.

I am then on hold for TWENTY MINUTES. I have never held for more than two when they were Commerce Bank. After getting to a phone rep who was not nearly as friendly as I recall (this is pretty subjective though) I explain my situation. They say 'we do not make checks immediately available.' What? What? You're smoking crack or something. They've always been that way. "Nope! Never. Never done that ever." Well then how come it's happened every time I've deposited a check in the past eight months? "Nope."

"Huh. Well... I'm not paying that fee."

"Please hold."

I wait another ten minutes.

"Yeah we're not refunding it."

"Thank you for this gratuitous waste of my time and congratulations on losing a customer."

I'm thinking a credit union or something. Commerce will no longer be my bank. To anyone I've ever suggested who should bank with them? Go find another bank. They're ruined, now. :I